This post is a continuation of last week’s Overcoming Self-Criticism. While I shared my story of working towards overcoming this nasty habit of being unkind to myself, I wanted to give some concrete ways of healthy self-talk.
So here’s a list of 5 things I have done in the past that has helped me with positive self-talk:
- Writing a “happy” list. I have written about things I am grateful for, or a list of my favorite things. I like to write down favorite memories, moments in nature, my favorite foods, etc. Sometimes remembering what you love and what makes you happy can help you to feel that happiness again.
- Reminding myself that it’s okay. It’s okay to feel. It’s okay to experience. I can move on from where I am. This particularly helps when I feeling stressed about being stressed, or angry about being angry. 🙂
- Using a creative outlet. Now, when I say this, I don’t mean that long novel you’re editing, or the piece of art that you can’t quite get right. I mean something fun. I’ve made collages, or played with acrylic paint. Sometimes I make up a silly song. I think the combination of creativity and play allows me to be more accepting of myself.
- Forgetting Myself. This one can seem counter-intuitive, but it does work. When I take time to try and make sure those around me feel loved, I tend to forget my doubts about being lovable myself. There are many different ways you can do this, including volunteer service, reaching out to coworkers or family members. (Of course, please don’t neglect your personal needs in the process.) This can be a great way of overcoming self-criticism.
- Write A Self-Love List -Seriously. Write down all of the things you love about yourself. What are your talents? Your interests? Your accomplishments? Personality traits? Sometimes this can be a little hard when you are feeling down -believe me, I know. So, you can start by asking friends, family and loved ones things they like about you. Or try writing things down when you are in a good mood. Then refer to this list when it gets really tough to be nice to yourself. I’ve made a list like this, and it has helped me to pull of many a rut.
These are some of the items in my toolbelt that I use when I am having a “hate Dana” moment. I hope that they will be able to help you on your journey towards a healthy self-relationship. 🙂